 |
Look into a mirror and say to your reflection, "I love you". No, don't laugh, this is serious! Find a mirror, look into your eyes and say those three little words. Don't just say it - mean it!
How did you go?
Did you think it would be easy, but then found you couldn't say the words? Did you find yourself muttering the words but looking away from your reflection to say them? If so, you're not alone. For the majority of us this is actually a very difficult exercise. (So, congratulations, if you had no problem.)
Many years ago, a workshop facilitator challenged each of us to do the same exercise. I thought it would be a breeze … until I stood in front of the mirror. Then I found I couldn't say anything. Well, actually, I could say, "I … I … I …" before I walked away saying something like, "This is ridiculous." By the way, it would be a little over a year before I could.
People whose self-esteem and self-respect have taken a beating cannot look into the mirror and say "I love you", let alone look in the mirror and say those three little words with feeling. It's because our self-talk has become so negative, that when we are faced with saying some nice about, or to, ourselves that we have problems.
How you talk to yourself is incredibly important. It defines how you treat yourself. You can be your own best friend or your own worst enemy depending on what you say. And what you say is tied in to the beliefs you have about yourself.
Let's use the last three articles as the bases for another couple of exercises.
We've explored why there is no such thing as a mistake, failure or 'should'.
So, go back to the mirror, look into your eyes and say, "You have made so many mistakes in your life, you should be ashamed of yourself." Jot down on a sheet of paper how you felt when you said this. Did you have any reaction in the body? If so, where and what?
Now say to your reflection, "You are such a failure!" Again, jot down on a sheet of paper how you felt, whether you had any reaction in the body and what it was.
Here's Challenge Number 1: say to the person in the mirror, "You have created so many learning opportunities in your life, and you are stronger for them. I am proud of you."
How did you feel when you said this? Did you have any reaction in the body? If so, what was your body's response?
Challenge Number 2: tell your reflection this: "You are a success, and you go from strength to strength." What were your feelings and body responses?
As you can see, the first two exercises had you saying something negative, and the challenges were to say something positive. If you had a problem with the I-love-you exercise you probably found the negative statements much easier to say.
It's a sad fact that in our society, we find it much easier to accept criticism than compliments. I'm sure you've said to someone, "That's a great shirt, it really suits you" and the response has been, "What this old thing?". How did you react the last time a compliment was paid to you? Did you accept it graciously, or make a negative remark in response?
The only truly acceptable response to a compliment is "Thank you" – accompanied by a smile, of course!
Do you ever take the time to compliment yourself? Do you talk to yourself as you would a friend? Or is it easier to criticise who you are, what you do, and how you look? If so, we are going to work on changing your attitude to yourself.
Compliments are a great way of making you (the receiver) feel good. They boost the morale. They increase the self-confidence. Compliments can have exactly the same effect on the giver of the compliment – when the compliment is received with a simple thank you and smile.
Here's how you can change the way you talk to yourself … EVERY MORNING after you have dressed, look into the mirror and pay yourself a compliment. "That's a great colour on you", "That colour matches your eyes", "You look fantastic!"
EVERY EVENING before you go to bed, look into the mirror and pay yourself a compliment for ONE thing you did that day. No matter whether you cooked a family meal which was devoured in minutes, or whether you managed to finish fiscal statements in time for a board meeting, choose one thing you did that day which pleased you and made you feel good. And if you truly cannot find one little thing, compliment yourself on being the best you could be all day.
This simple (or not so simple!) exercise will bring you heaps of benefits. For a start, you begin and end your day on a high. During the day you will find yourself looking for opportunities to hand out compliments. You will find yourself becoming more positive – and because you are looking for positive things to say and do, positive things come looking for you.
Other benefits include: a change in posture (you will stand straighter), a change in attitude (you become more confident), a change in behaviour (your language and action will improve). In short – you will become a much happier person.
There's a spin-off to this, that I should warn you about …. you will find yourself pulling faces at your reflection! Don't be surprised when it happens because it's a very normal (and expected) consequence of becoming happier with who you are. We laugh and joke with our friends, so why not laugh and joke with ourselves?
how to write an essay for dummies <a href="https://essaywritersoks.org/">writing a reflective essay</a> how to write an introductory paragraph for an argumentative essay
Like any other ability, memory can be trained and developed. The main thing is to choose the right exercise program.
Remembering the name of an actor or finding the keys left in the evening can sometimes be difficult. It takes a lot of effort to recover the information you need. Forgetting is a natural process that is designed to unload the nervous system from unclaimed information, to protect it from overstrain. But increased forgetfulness can significantly complicate life. It can be caused by lack of sleep, stress, addictions, or information overload.
If this problem is not related to injury or illness, it is realistic to solve it on your own. Memory can be developed and improved like any other ability. To activate its potential, regular exercise is necessary, as in sports or music. And vice versa - in their absence, the ability of the brain to memorize will decrease. Let's talk about the most effective ways to help strengthen memory and improve brain function.
1. Create associations and visualizations
It will be easier to remember new things if you connect the unknown with the already existing knowledge. The essence of the method of associations is to combine the known and the unknown into a single history, to mark new information with familiar markers. So the information received can be easily remembered and quickly reproduced at the right time. With the help of associative parallels, it is easy to learn road signs, passwords and dates, phone numbers and credit cards.
In 1980, the Olympic Games opened in Moscow, and 600 years before that, the Battle of Kulikovo took place. The number 5813 can be represented as a numerical expression 5 + 8 = 13. In this case, images are remembered even more efficiently. Better if they are unusual and even absurd. For example, the figure eight resembles a woman with large hips and voluminous breasts, and the figure five is a circus unicycle. In your mind, draw a fat lady who buys such a bike and rides it around the city.
how to write a good study abroad essay <a href="https://essaywritersoks.org/">importance of college essay</a> how to write a bursary essay
Such illustrations should be large, three-dimensional, color and as detailed as possible. The skill of coding into visual images is trained and quickly automated. In the future, it will not be difficult to restore in memory both these images, and the meaning that is embedded in them. Once again putting the keys in this or that place, imagine a flower blooming here. In the morning you will definitely not forget where exactly the flower grew in your house, and you will quickly find the right thing.
2. Learn poetry and read aloud
The time-tested method is memorizing poems. This is not about mindless cramming, but about understanding the meaning, its conscious perception. Make it a rule to teach one little piece every week. Gradually increase the volume of the material. It will be easier to remember if you break it down into several parts in advance and teach it in quatrains. You can do this anywhere: at lunch, while walking or in transport. Don't be afraid of a lot of repetitions. Over time, you will notice that it takes less and less time to memorize.
The effect will be even better if you take the works of those authors whose collections do not interest you. It will take more energy to learn such verses. Try to delve deeply into their content and reflect on the artistic techniques that the author used. Poetry can be recited in front of a mirror or recorded from memory. Reading aloud is equally useful. It helps to improve diction, intonation and develops auditory memory. If you don't like poetry, learn the lyrics.
3. Try to remember forgotten
It is not necessary to take the shopping list prepared before going to the store. On the one hand, such a list will help not to miss anything and at the same time not to buy too much. On the other hand, its absence will have a positive effect on the state of memory. Do not buy something this time - by the next trip you will have an incentive to better memorize items from the list and keep them in mind. Forgot someone's name, phone number, password or recipe ingredients? Try to remember. Take the time and take a few minutes to do this instead of looking for an answer in your smartphone or notebook. This is great for strengthening memory.
4. Master foreign languages
You can learn poems and songs not only in your native language. Don't know a foreign language - start mastering it. It is one of the best ways to activate brain cells and enhance memory capacity. If you memorize a few words every day, then after a couple of months you can feel a noticeable result. Learning a new language develops the ability to structure, analyze and memorize information. In addition, it is a good prevention of age-related diseases. For example, Alzheimer's disease. The most popular way to memorize foreign vocabulary is cards with words and expressions. This technique is based precisely on visual associations.
5. Remember the events of the day
Another way to activate memory is to plunge into the past day and remember all its events. Before going to bed, try to reconstruct snippets of dialogue, images of people, their facial expressions and gestures, every phone call and meals that made up your diet. Try to recreate the sequence of all actions from the moment of awakening. Provide these pictures in as much detail as possible. At the same time, it is important to connect imagination, visual, auditory and olfactory memory.
If it’s boring to remember the day in the form of imaginary illustrations, keep a diary and regularly write events on paper. It is recommended to repeat the same with the films watched. After the next movie show, scroll through the plot in your head again. Remember not only the main moments, but also the dialogues of the characters, the details of their clothes, the interiors of the shooting locations. It is even more useful to retell the content of films, plays, read articles and books to your friends. This not only trains memory well, but also develops speech, enriches vocabulary.
how to write a 400 word essay <a href="https://essaywritersoks.org/">help writing an essay for college</a> how to write advice essay